The 2 Things That Separate the Successful from Unsuccessful

Throughout my tenure as a coach, I've been able to clearly define the biggest differentiators between my clients who experience massive transformations and those don’t reach their full potential.⁣

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Investing in oneself via coaching is a MASSIVE step in itself—one that many aren't courageous or bold enough to take.👏🏻

However, that's only the beginning of the work.

Making a change with something so integral to our lives like food requires gumption, commitment, self-awareness, and a whole slew of other commendable qualities.😍

Let's take a look at what separates the mega-successful from the average success story (which is still an amazing result that I'm committed to providing at a baseline).

This may very likely be true for you too, so now is a good time to take an honest inventory of where you fall!

⒈ Playing the long-game—if you’re still reaching for short-term results and are approaching your health, mindset, and/or weight with a sense of desperation, you won’t succeed in a meaningful way.⁣

I know you might be feeling uncomfortable—physically or mentally—but ACCEPTING the present is hugely important! Running from your situation NOW only leads to short-cuts. And that’s what got you here in the first place!⁣❌

Focus on one thing at a time, starting with your mindset & relationship with food. Get that locked down *tightly* first, and you can pursue your other goals later.

⒉ Willingness to be uncomfortable—change feels awkward for each & every one of us, at least to some degree. It’s part of our human nature!⁣

Being willing to act in spite of that discomfort is everything! Clinging to old patterns & rules might make you *feel* safe, but it’s only keeping you stuck.⁣😣

Making a change, especially one that involves something we interact with several times per day (FOOD!), requires a serious level of commitment. And to be frank, most people just aren't willing to put in the work required to see the change they want.

While these are simple, they aren’t always easy to implement. Another reason why the accountability & support of a coach is SO DAMN VALUABLE!

Don’t worry—I’ve got you:) The next round of Food Freedom Evolution (FFE), my 12-week transformational program that takes you from food obsessed to completely at ease with food starts in September!

If you're struggling with consistently moving that body of yours...

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Let’s do a compete reframe with movement & exercise.

This is especially needed if you find yourself struggling with…

Being consistent. 

An all-or-nothing mentality.

In these cases, there is a fundamental lack of *true* respect for our bodies, and we’re MUCH too focused on the surface level bullshit.

No judgment, btw, as I’ve been sitting squarely in each category!🙋🏻‍♀️

The solution?

Consider the worst case scenario with your body—[this has to be something that would severely limit your ability to move to the extent you’re capable of today].

Sounds dark, but stay with me!🙃

For me, I’ve always feared becoming paralyzed and not having the ability to use my legs.

Whenever I find myself wanting to take the escalator, elevator, a short uber ride, or go to the gym, I imagine what it would feel like to *NOT* have the privilege of movement.

Because that’s exactly what it is: a privilege.

This doesn’t mean you that you go overboard with excessive exercise either, because that’s demonstrating a lack of respect for your body, too.

Start viewing your body as a gift for YOU to live this beautiful life in rather than a greeting card for others to look at & watch your relationship with exercise transform.

How are you respecting your body with movement today?

Why Making Changes with Your Food Behaviors is SO. DAMN. DIFFICULT!

Human behavior isn’t compartmentalized.

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That’s right.

The old adage of,

“How you do one thing is how you do everything.”,

really is true!

Especially when it comes to how you interact with food.

Some common examples:

  • The woman who lacks boundaries & is afraid to use her voice allows others to dictate her food choices. This means listening to others (diets, “gurus”, doctors, family, etc.) over her own body & preferences. She likely uses food to numb/soothe too!

  • The woman who needs to be liked by others & changes based on her surroundings eats & drinks what everyone else is eating & drinking.

  • The woman who’s afraid to step outside of the box with how she lives her life (can’t stray from the predetermined plan!) is sticking to the foods & routines she knows & is comfortable with.

  • The woman who believes she & her life are for others—not herself—is going to succumb to societal norms with food & body. Pleasing others is more important than being true to herself.

  • The woman whose energy is scattered, is moving at 100 mph, and is constantly seeking the next thrill eats quickly & without presence. 

  • The woman who is afraid of experiencing pleasure makes food choices that are often quite boring! She’s fearful of her own enjoyment.

There are endless possibilities here, but you can see that your relationship with food is a mirror for your relationship with SO MANY other facets of life!

Most importantly, your relationship with yourself.

Instead of *just* looking at food, how can you start to make adjustments with how you’re showing up in LIFE?

At first glance, this might seem like a much bigger mountain to climb, but it isn’t!

In fact, if you start focusing on your foundation (belief systems, relationship with self, relationship with life) rather than the surface, not only will the changes actually last, but they’ll be much easier to come by.

For today, just start with awareness. Start drawing those parallels between how you interact with food and the other areas of your life!

My Response to People Saying That More Freedom with Food Leads to Eating Donuts & Watching Netflix All Day

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There's a common narrative today when it comes to a more "intuitive" way of eating (although I don't subscribe to "intuitive eating" in the way many do).

It usually goes something like this:

"Well, my intuition tells me to eat donuts and pizza and watch netflix every day, and it's what led me to gain weight in the first place."

I'm calling bullshit.

This way of thinking is just plain lazy.

It’s surface-level, and it’s why we find ourselves in this whole diet confused mess to begin with!

Why are so many people thinking this way?

Because they don’t want to look at WHY we eat the way we do.

At first glance, this approach is more difficult to practice, implement & coach (🙋🏻‍♀️), but that’s really only in the short-term.

Giving you numbers to hit and sending you on your merry way would make my job a HELL of a lot easier, but it wouldn’t change anything in any meaningful way.

It’s just the tip of the iceberg, when what you REALLY *need* (not want), is a complete transformation of your foundation!

💥A better understanding of your own preferences, goals, values, & body.

💥Exploration of what foods, habits & behaviors make you and your body come alive!

💥An individualized definition of health—you decide what that means.

💥Increased self-worth.

💥Stronger boundaries.

💥More tools to manage day-to-day stressors & emotions outside of food and controlling your body.

💥A realignment of your energy with your values (is your life truly fulfilling?).

💥Some damn respect for the vessel you’re experiencing life in.

Do these things take more time than following a set of macros or blindly adhering to a list of approved foods?

FUCK👏🏻 YES👏🏻

But these are the things that will make it so you don’t have to follow these things one year from now!

Stop being so willing to choose a “side” and turning your critical thinking skills off as a result.

You know SO much more than you think you do! You may just need some guidance on how to get there✨

Have a wonderful week, and remember that YOU are the one/thing/idea you've been waiting for!

If you don’t want to be standing in the exact same spot with food one year from now…

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Then you have to stop seeking short-term gratification.

I know, I know—it feels so damn good (now) to watch the changes occur rapidly & to succumb to every whim!

But how has that worked for you thus far?

I’m guessing not well, or you wouldn’t be here😜

While *patience* may not be the sexiest word on the planet, it’s a HUGE sign of maturity. And it’s a requirement for a long-lasting, healthy relationship with food!

You have to be willing to sacrifice your desire for quick endorphin hits for deep & sustainable health—mentally & physically.

Make no mistake! If you’re consistently…

  • Bouncing around from one extreme to the other (all-or-nothing)

  • Obsessed with your tightly controlled & miserable routine.

  • Eating a bunch of shit that doesn’t serve you all the time (YOLO)

  • Refusing to look at your emotional state & are seeking escape.

  • Focusing on your appearance at the expense of your mental & physical health…

You’re sacrificing your future self.

You’re letting your ego or monkey brain run the show instead of the real-mature-evolved-deeply-knowing you make the decisions.

What does patience (& maturity) look like?

  • Developing a positive relationship with food BEFORE pursuing aesthetic goals.

  • Learning skills to navigate discomfort outside of food, exercise & manipulating your body.

  • Taking the time to understand WHY you interact with food & your body the way you do.

  • Prioritizing physical health over aesthetic goals.

  • Taking the time to learn about your own body, preferences, & goals rather than blindly following everyone else’s.

These outcomes are what everyone wants, but very few are willing to put in the work. To sacrifice child-like temptations (I get them too, big time!).

But I promise you—you’ll be SO DAMN HAPPY, PROUD, & EMPOWERED when you do!

A Statement From My Dad That Left Me SHOOK

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“Your body is one of your greatest tools. Have fun with it!”

  • Bill Golden, my dad

I was discussing my work with him a couple weeks ago, and as we mulled over body image, he candidly made the statement above.

It stopped me dead in my tracks.

So simple, yet so profound.

Also the perspective of someone who’s never struggled with any body image hang-ups.

Rain or shine, 20 lbs. up or down, he shows up as the exact same person.

He’s had goals to gain or lose weight as HE sees fit, but he’s never allowed any iteration of his body to deter him from showing up in this world.

We can discuss the differences in pressure that women are subjected to versus men, sure. Although men are absolutely not immune to similar pressures and side effects.

However, I believe it’s really important to seek the perspectives of those who *don’t* have body image hang-ups.

Engage in these discussions, seek alternative view-points, and get out of your own head.

You may be surprised at how differently you view the world and—just maybe—that beautiful vessel you’re experiencing this world in.

Now, let’s go have some fun with these bodies of ours, shall we?

You can find me playing in nature, in the gym, or in yoga class with mine!

What about you?

Is It Time for Your Workout Routine to Evolve?

Hiking over crossfit these days!

Hiking over crossfit these days!

I'm currently on month number five with my break from Crossfit, and I continue to receive messages from women on Instagram about their fears of taking a step back from their intense regimens.

Are you allowing yourself—and your exercise habits—to evolve?✨

Or are you forcing them to stay the same, despite your body & mind telling you otherwise?✋

What worked for you then may not be working for you now.

At the very least, there's a chance it won’t in the future.

I learned this lesson the hard way last year when I had to take a step back from Crossfit.

I STRUGGLED with it.

It wasn’t used for weight management—it was used as performance/self-worth management (without knowing it at the time).

Whether you find yourself clinging to your detrimental workout routine to…

prove yourself via your performance

OR

to control your appearance

...it’s likely time for a break.🥴

Movement is something we’re designed to do (usually), and it should be a means of celebrating our bodies.

Of having FUN!💃

What to do if you’re showing up to the gym out of fear rather than love?

  1. Take a break. I promise, you don’t die!

  2. Focus on methods of moving that allow you to connect with your body. Things like yoga, dance, walking & slower weight training are great places to start.

Consider WHY you feel the need to run yourself into the ground & prove yourself.

Just as “it’s never about the food”, it’s also not about the exercise.❤️

What’s your fave way to move?